Houses in dreams often serve dual metaphors. They can reflect our selves (the upstairs represents consciousness and the higher self, while the basement symbolizes the subconscious) and, if they are under construction, they can represent projects we are working on, and plans that we have made.
The fireplace in your dream house is a symbol of emotional warmth and security. The stairwell leading upstairs from the kitchen suggests easy access to your higher self. It is a comforting and inviting house, full of warmth and wisdom. Who wouldn't want to live there, symbolically or literally?
Because the house is new (albeit rebuilt) it almost certainly also represents your hopes for your new marriage. You are filled with excitement as you anticipate living in your home, but unfortunately, the joys of ownership are short-lived. Just as you realize the fragility of your house, an earthquake strikes, causing it to collapse around you. A hole in the ceiling spares your life, but you are filled with despair nonetheless.
Earthquakes in dreams (and other natural disasters) are symbols of instability and uncertainty about the future. Given what you have told us of recent events, it's easy to identify the recent "bumps" in the highway of your new marriage. Your husband's 18-year-old daughter has moved in, and he has been laid off his job. Neither event was anticipated, and either alone would be sufficient to stress a young marriage.
Your dream reflects fears that plans made carefully in the wake of your first marriage -- plans to repair both your self and your family life -- may be collapsing around you. Anyone who is married, however, knows how early expectations evolve with time. Your dream shows your marriage has encountered unexpected stress, but I don't believe it means it is in the process of collapse. Indeed, the most significant event in the dream is the fact that you emerge untouched from the rubble that surrounds you. The message of your dream is that you are a survivor -- and survivors build homes that last.