Hi Elizabeth—
I'm happy to hear that, after an early misstep, you've landed squarely on your feet. Congratulations on your healthy child and marriage.
I agree that the pools are linked, in your mind, with the father of your child. The association is literal, because he owned a pool, but, as is often the case, the symbol serves a deeper meaning. Water in dreams represents emotions. By extension, pools often represent our "emotional bodies" (bodies of water). In your dreams, you never are able to find a pool (emotional space) that is suitable to swim in, because they either are empty, they don't exist, or they are occupied by people having sex.
Your inability to locate an appropriate pool, though you yearn for it, suggests your relationship with this former lover was incomplete (empty and nonexistent?). Boundary issues between love and sex also are indicated. We know your former lover enjoyed sex with you, but it is apparent his feelings didn't extend to include commitment and responsibility. Perhaps this explains the context of "motels" (well-known locations for transient sexual liaisons), where every room, it seems, contains multiple partners? Was your ex more interested in sex than love?
Because this man is the father of your child, resolution of your relationship with him is essential, even if it is a simple acknowledgment, on your behalf, that you made an early misstep. Instead of concentrating on the past, though, I think you should give yourself a big pat on the back for surviving, and thriving, in what surely was a difficult situation. It's apparent that, in your real life, you stepped outside this "maze of emotion" a long time ago. The proof is your successful marriage to your husband, who loves both you and your child.
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